Thursday, December 22, 2005

Giblets Resonds

Um ... hello! This will be a quick post because ... um ... well ... I'd rather nap that post right now. I don't know why, but I am feeling a little sleepy. Maybe it is Winter Solstice. Or maybe it is because the sheets are clean. Whatever the reason, I would rather spend my time dreaming of satelite television than type right now. I know it isn't very nice of me, but ... um ... deal.

Was that right, Buffy? Deal? Blowing people off is kinda new to me? ... It is, right?! Oooh, score one for the Wags dog! I'm in the house! ... What's that, Buffy? ... Oh, I see. ... No, that's okay. I probably was pushing it a bit far. I'll try to be careful with my slang.

Um ... where was I? Oh, yeah, yea, I was going to quickly post. You might remember Duck's angry post about Giblet calling ducks a failure. Oooh, he was verrry angry. I don't think I had ever seen Duck so angry. So I sent Giblets this email ...

On 12/4/05, Wagsy Dog wrote:

Um ... hello! How are you, Mr. Giblets? Um ... I don't know how to say this nicely, but ... um ... one of your recent posts ruffled some feathers in our household. You see a duck and a moose are good friends of mine. Yeah. And they ... um ... were kind of upset that you described their species about as "failures." Duck took it very hard since you were one of his favorite bloggers. Duck has aspirations for world domination, too, you see? Um ... it's kind of like being told by Michael Jordan that you'll never amount to more than a door stop. Oooh, that wouldn't be very pleasant.

Duck expressed his outrage in a post, but he's still fuming. Yeah, yeah. Normally posting is cathartic for him, but I think he really wants an apology. Um ... looking over your posts, I don't think you're too likely to apologize, because ... um ... well ... um ... you seem a little belligerent. But I thought I'd write and let you know how upset we are with you, Mr. Giblets. I'm sure there are other ducks that are mad at you, but --

What's that moose? ... Yes, yes, Moose is mad at you, too. Um ... we're all a little mad at you right now, but I suspect that it will go away quickly. That's the problem with having stuffin' for brains. It's hard to hold grudges.


Wagsy (on behalf of Duck ... and Moose)

I figured writing a nice letter was the professional way to deal with the matter. I didn't really expect a reply, because ... well Fafblog is kinda busy and ... um ... Giblets doesn't seem like the type of person who cares much about the feelings of others. But he did. Giblets did respond. He didn't exactly apologize, but he at least cared enough to send a response ...

On 12/20/05 Giblets replied:

Oh yes so you know ducks and meeses do you? Well, some of Giblets's best friends are ducks and mooses, like the wise Judge Duck or the Nobel-prize winning Doctor Gustavus Moose. Failures all! Giblets's standard for success is as follows:

-Giblets: success
-Not-Giblets: failure!

All around him Giblets is surrounded by failures. Giblets does not hold it against them, which is one of the great keys to Giblets's success (he is quite a magnanimous Giblets).

P.S. Giblets apologizes for the lateness of this reply, Giblets has been sick. Sick with success!

Um ... as I said, he doesn't care much about other people's feelings. But at least he explained that it isn't personal. I suppose Giblets did call everyone a failure. Well, except penicillin. I guess penicillin should be flattered to be consider a "a moderate disappointment." Um ... maybe I shouldn't write to such mean people. He might call me names.

I'm not sure if I should show this letter to Duck. It might just rile him up again.


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