Friday, September 09, 2005

Happy North American Teddy Bear Day

Go figure. Today is North American Teddy Bear Day. There are some things in life that are just plain confoundin'. Now I read Harriet's work. I know that globalization is something that is happenin' and can be measured. I did some google searches on NAFTA to see what people were sayin' before it passed. Predictions of increased competition in industrial and agricultural markets -- you bet. Fears about falling environmental standards in all three countries -- yup, mountains of words on the subject. Cultural hegemony? Well, I didn't find anything on it, but I am sure that somebody somewhere wrote some thoughts on the matter.

But continent wide holidays? That is just plain weird. Now I'm for teddy bears receiving their due respect, but I don't want to see the United States Congress lose its authority to pick and choose our holidays. NATIONAL teddy bear day, now that is a whole another basket of blankets. I'm all for Congress paying tribute to the patriotic and brave teddy bears in our country. But NORTH AMERICAN teddy bear day kinda creeps me out. Who decided to hold teddy bear day. If it was a blue ribbon panel, who appointed the panel? If it wasn't a blue ribbon panel, then why wasn't it worthy of a blue ribbon panel? These questions just need to be answered.

I had a whole heap of questions about this "holiday," so I paid a visit to Pudgie. Here's what the good professor had to say ...

Pudgie: It is a most curious phenomenon indeed. Typically, theorists of global cultural hegemony posit a market mechanism for the spread of mass culture. Consumers in the global market place change consumption patterns and in the process leave behind cultural heritage. However, this holiday appears to have been decided to executive (or legislative) fiat. I cannot think of an example in history of legislated cultural hegemony that did not involve raw imperial or colonial power. In fact, the closest analogy I can think of is international human rights law. Perhaps the Republican fears of reduced sovereignty from drawing upon European rulings as precedent in our court system are not wholly unfounded.

See? THAT is why I hang out with Professor Pudge Bear. I just can't find conversation like that anywhere else in the house (and, yes, that does include Harriet and Ozzie). It wasn't like the other bears weren't talkin' about Teddy Bear Day -- the whole house was abuzz. But the type of conversation was a little different:

Wagsy: Um ... I think it is very nice.

Moose: Moose!

Gladstone: Quite right. What this country needs is a few more proper banking holidays.

Duck: Quack quack quack quACK. Quack quack quack QUAck Quack quack. Quack quack quack. Quack quack quackquack QUACK QUACK! quackquackquackquack.

Moose: Moose!

Buffy: Like the holiday is nice and all, but it really can't stop here. I mean what is the point of a holiday if no one is noticing or celebrating? I mean it is a like a party that no one shows up for. Actually, it is way worse than that. It is like a party that no one decided to throw. I mean that would be so lame. What the holiday needs is like a big teddy bear parade. They could even crown a teddy bear queen and everything. That would be so cool.

Wagsy: Yeah, yeah. It would be cute. But I'd want to make sure that all the teddy bears are safely up on floats so that they are away from dirt and candy and children. Then I think I'd like it.

Moose: Moose!

That conversation ain't exactly the Dick Cavett Show. My biggest concern that my colleagues don't seem at all worried about the holiday's history or origins. I gotta say, I'm mighty suspicious of new holidays. Some holidays look like they are created by the flowers, card, and candy conglomerates to artificially boost demand for their products. Other holidays are just congress people tryin' to curry favor with their constituents by passing cheap and meaningless legislation. I'll be silk sheets to sea weed that we're talkin' about constituent curryin' here. But I want to know who is curryin' favor with whom.

Anywho, I'm not wholly embracing this holiday until I know more about it. In the mean time, I'll offer a cautious happy North American Teddy Bear Day to my readers.

Still spectating and speculating in The Bed. -- Goofball


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